KAI RYSSDAL: The president blames speculators for high gas prices. He’s promising an investigation. But the speculators, or investors if you will, say hey, it’s not us. Fault aside, gas isn’t getting any cheaper. Seems the price is going up by the day. Or as the comedy sketch group “Nice Kitchen” from the Upright Citizens Brigade puts it — maybe even faster.

CASHIER: All right, so that’s ten gallons at $4.75 a gallon.

CUSTOMER: Four dollars and seventy-five cents for a gallon of gas? Yikes. I mean I remember when it was less than a dollar.

CASHIER: Oh yeah, that wasn’t even that long ago… like 1998.

CUSTOMER: Yeah, I mean you gotta drive, right? But still… $4.75?!

CASHIER: Well, it’s now $5.

CUSTOMER: I’m sorry?

CASHIER: While we were chatting the price went up. It’s now $5 a gallon.

CUSTOMER: How is that possible?

CASHIER: Hey, I just go by what the computer tells me, ma’am.

CUSTOMER: Fine, whatever. You guys take Visa?

CASHIER: Yeah. Oh, and also, the price is now $5.85.

CUSTOMER: $5.85!!! OK, this is crazy! How could the price go up again?

CASHIER: It’s probably related to all that turmoil in the Middle East right now. Don’t you watch the news?

CUSTOMER: Yes, but I didn’t realize that would make gas hit $5.85! I mean, it was just $4.75.

CASHIER: Oh yeah, I remember that. The good ol’ days of $4.75 gas.

CUSTOMER: That was 60 seconds ago!

CASHIER: Actually, while you were ranting gas dropped to $0.20 a gallon.

CUSTOMER: Seriously? That’s incredible!

CASHIER: But now its back up — $19 a gallon.

CUSTOMER: Ugh!

RYSSDAL: That was Julie Whitesell and Ann Maddox of the “Nice Kitchen” comedy group. You can find sketches from the Upright Citizens Brigade and others in our related links section down below.