New parenthood comes with new expenses: car seats, diapers, formula. Then there are the “extras” that feel sort of mandatory.

“Yeah, you’re supposed to take your kid to the pumpkin patch. It’s supposed to be really cute,” said Alex Parsons, who is here on a windy Sunday with her husband A.J. Adeleye and their 9-month-old, June.

Those two are sharing a turkey leg while Alex and I chat. And June is loving that turkey.

The Parsons-Adeleye family lives in Sandia Park, New Mexico. Between tickets, food, and a ride on the train, this trip to the pumpkin patch cost them about $80.

These days, it feels like they can’t leave the house without spending that much.

“It’s like death by 1,000 cuts,” Parsons said. “Even things like the formula that she eats, that we had to get her to eat is like $40 a can.”

But one of the biggest line items in the family budget is day care. Alex and A.J. take baby June to a center that costs $16,000 a year.

“We just try not to think about it and just make space in our budget, because we really don't have a choice,” Parsons said.

37-year-old Alex is a middle school math teacher; 42-year-old A.J. is a government engineer. Together, they make around $180,000 a year.

But their paychecks get eaten up fast by their mortgage, home maintenance on their fixer-upper, student debt payments, and, now, child care.

“I think it's important to know that the cost of child care is not only a low-income family problem,” said Elise Gould with the Economic Policy Institute.

The cost of child care is rising faster than overall inflation and straining household budgets. Gould’s research finds that in most of the country, including New Mexico, day care is more expensive than public university tuition or the average cost of housing.

“Even those that are able to pay, they may forgo other kinds of investments in terms of being able to save for college, being able to save for retirement, or for a rainy day or job loss,” she said.

Alex Parsons said all of those tradeoffs are happening in her house. But starting this month, the state of New Mexico is footing the entire bill for June’s day care. New Mexico expanded its daycare subsidy to benefit all families, regardless of income, and the program will be paid for largely by the state’s oil and gas revenue.

“It's a huge relief to our family, short-term,” she said — especially since A.J. is a federal worker and isn’t getting a paycheck right now.

Medium term, Alex hopes they’ll save enough to replace their home’s threadbare carpet and chipping linoleum floors before baby June starts crawling.

Long term, Alex said 2026 could be the year she and A.J. get serious about retirement savings.

“What's had to take the biggest hit to make space for the daycare cost has been planning for our long-term future. What is our life gonna be like when she's grown up and gone?” she said.

Right now, Alex and A.J. said it doesn’t feel safe to bank on any government help, but they’re cautiously hopeful this change will give them some financial breathing room.