A slice of pizza with a side of flattery

This final note today. We saw an article about this, a pizza chain in England this morning. Apparently, it’s hired a trained classical actor to teach employees how to flirt, and so get customers to order more.

Perfect fodder, we thought for the Marketplace Players:

Cashier: Welcome to Pizza Express. Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate.

Man: Uh… Thanks?

Woman, whispering: I think he’s talking to me honey.

Cashier: May I recommend the bruschetta to start for the lady? And may I compare thine countenance to the lovely sea, glittering, soft, shrouding, hidden depths.

Man: Or can we just order.

Woman: Bruschetta sounds lovely. And the prosciutto and the mozzerrella pizza.

Man: And that’s it.

Cashier: Of course. A woman of such obvious passions wouldn’t dare escape igniting her lust with wine.

Woman: Mmmmm… And a bottle of pinot.

Man: To go.

Woman: For here!