Microsoft has announced the Windows Phone 8, the other dropped shoe to go along with the newly announced Surface tablet. Pretty exciting news for people who already have a Windows Phone 7 who get to upgrade, right? WRONG. If they want the new operating system, they gotta buy a whole dang new phone. Wow, Microsoft. Wow.

But if they do, here’s what they get, according to Wired:

Microsoft announced eight specific platform updates for its upcoming mobile OS. We’ve already covered one of the most consumer-facing updates, the new Start Screen, but other changes include hardware-related features like multi-core processor and memory card support, a revamped Internet Explorer 10, shared native code between Windows Phone 8 and Windows 8, NFC support, a new Wallet hub, Nokia Maps, and Windows Phone 8 for business.

Not all of these will be available right away. Aaaand the screen resolution is reported to be not as good as iPhone or Android. So! WHO’S FIRST TO BUY ONE?

*Man, that could be the name of a Fiona Apple album