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®OYALTIES, ©OPY®IGHTS, and T®ADEMA®KS™

(SFX: CROWDED ROOM)

RYAN: Ahhhh! I’m so excited we’re finally taking Million Bazillion to my favorite activity in the world: karaoke night! 

BRIDGET: Yeah, you’ve been asking if we can do an episode set at karaoke night forever, and I initially refused because I’m not the world’s most confident singer-

RYAN: Awww, Bridget’s don’t sell yourself short! You’re short enough already. Hahaha.

BRIDGET: But tonight, I’m excited to get on that stage and give it my all, y’know, really belt out some power ballads.

RYAN: That’s the spirit! You’re gonna knock ‘em dead! Right after I blow the audience away with my own golden-voiced crooning.

KARAOKE HOST: Alriiiight! Your first singer up at the mic tonight- as usual- is Ryan!

RYAN: (INTO STAGE MIC) Ok everybody, are you ready to hear me sing “If I Could Turn Back Time” in the style of Cher!?! 

(SFX: CROWD WHOOPS)

RYAN: Here we go!

(SFX: BUTTONS PRESSED, NO MUSIC)

KARAOKE HOST: (WHISPERS) Uhhh, something’s wrong. The machine won’t play that song. 

(SFX: CROWD GETTING RESTLESS)

BRIDGET: Maybe just choose a different song?

RYAN: Ok, forget Cher for now. Let’s take a trip out of this world…  with Elton John’s “Rocketman”?

(SFX: CROWD WHOOPS)

KARAOKE HOST: Awesome choice! In three, two, one… blastoff!

(SFX: BUTTONS PRESSED, NO MUSIC)

KARAOKE HOST: (SIDE MOUTH) It’s not working. Something’s wrong. 

BRIDGET: Maybe the machine’s broken?

(SFX: CROWD GROWING RESTLESS)

KARAOKE HOST: Alright, let’s skip Ryan for the moment and welcome our next singer to the stage, Bridget!

(SFX: CROWD APPLAUSE)

BRIDGET: Hi, everybody! Who’s ready for my shaky, but A-for-Effort rendition of “Kiss from a Rose” by Seal!?

(SFX: CROWD WHOOPS) 

(SFX: BUTTONS PRESSED, NO MUSIC)

(SFX: CROWD GROWING RESTLESS, SCATTERING OF BOOS)

KARAOKE HOST: (WORRIED) That one’s not playing either.

KARAOKE HOOLIGAN: What is this? Having some kinda laugh? Stop wasting our time!

RYAN: I promise! It’s not a joke! The machine won’t play our songs!  (ASIDE) Uh oh, Bridget, these karaoke hooligans are getting restless.

(SFX: CROWD GRUMBLING AND YELLING, STRONGER BOOS)

KARAOKE HOOLIGAN:  Get off the stage! You’re disrespecting Cher!!

RYAN: Oh no! The crowd has turned on us! We better get outta here!

–Theme Music–

(SFX: ALLEYWAY AMBIENCE)

(SFX: DOOR OPENS)

RYAN: (HUFFING AND PUFFING) Welcome to Million Bazillion! I’m Ryan!

BRIDGET: (HUFFING AND PUFFING) And I’m Bridget! And we help dollars make more sense! (CATCHES BREATH) Whooo. That was a close one. We almost got torn apart by that rowdy crowd. I had no idea there was such a thing as karaoke hooligans.

RYAN: I still can’t figure out what happened! That karaoke machine has never refused to play my songs before. And on the day we decide to record an episode there, no songs! So weird!

BRIDGET: Well, if we’re not gonna sing tonight, we might as well hear a listener question. 

GARRET: Hi, my name is Garret from Redding, Massachusetts. My question is, what are royalties, trademark and copyright? Thank you! 

BRIDGET: Oooo, copyright, trademarks, and royalties, oh my!  Thank YOU Garrett,  for this really interesting topic!

RYAN:! Yes, it’s one that I’ve learned about… the hard way.

(MUSIC: FOREBODING STING)

BRIDGET: (BEAT) What happened?

(MUSIC: AVATAR-ESQUE)

RYAN: A few years ago, I downloaded an illegally pirated bootleg of Avatar and screened it in my backyard, charging my neighbors twenty dollars each to come watch it. I even provided 3D glasses that I personally engineered. People said my 3D system was so immersive, it gave them a giant headache. I thought I’d created the best business model in the world. But turns out what I was doing was against the law.  I was trying to profit off of Intellectual Property I didn’t own–

BRIDGET: [INTERRUPTING]  Intellectual Property,that’s like other kinds of property you own, but a creation of the mind: intellectual. property. 

RYAN: Yes, IP for short. 

BRIDGET: And yeah, it’s illegal to try to make money from someone else’s idea if you don’t get permission first. Because, we believe that you should be able to make money from a good idea, even if it’s a creative work of art. 

RYAN: Yes, and as I learned, copyright and trademarks - those are rules to  legally protect your intellectual property. And Royalties is how you get paid and it’s something lawyers can be very passionate about and that’s all I’m legally allowed to say on the matter.

BRIDGET: Oookay then. Well, you can also think of it like - when you do your homework, you write your name at the top, right? Well a copyright in the most basic sense is basically you claiming the work you did. And no one else is supposed to copy your homework. 

(END MUSIC)

RYAN: Wait a minute! I think I know why the karaoke machine refuses to play our songs! All the songs we wanted to sing are copyrighted and we haven’t purchased the rights to use them on Million Bazillion. So we can’t play them on our show!

BRIDGET: what? How is that even possible??

RYAN: Check this out, I’ll try to sing Taylor Swift’s “Shake It Off” and let’s see how far I get.  (SINGS) “I stay out too-” (STRANGLED SOUND) See? I couldn’t even finish the first line.

 [BEAT]

RYAN: You know what we’re gonna have to do? 

BRIDGET: Please don’t say “raise hundreds of thousands of dollars so we can sing a Cher song in this episode.” I’m pretty sure that’s not the wisest use of our limited podcast budget. 

RYAN: No, we should create our own song to sing at karaoke! That way, it can be played on Million Bazillion. And through the process of copyrighting our own intellectual property, we’ll answer Garret’s question in more gloriously nerdy detail than any kid could ever possibly want on this subject- and with any luck, our song will become so popular, we earn a few royalties of our own. 

BRIDGET: Alright, well I appreciate your optimism. Let’s take a quick break and we’ll get into it. Right after this.

–ARK–

KIMBERLY: And now … it’s time for Asking Random Kids Not-So-Random Questions … Today’s question is: If you could invent a new toy, what would it be? (producer note: royalties episode)

--

I would build a robot that would make new toys for you.

A chair that could, like, hover above the ground, and it could shoot Nerf guns.

It would be like a sort of doll that could project images of your thoughts on a wall. 

A animal-changing robot.

A silver ball that would change into whichever toy you wanted at the time.

It would be called the Crafter. You place blocks on a grid, like in Minecraft, then the Crafter would drop down and glue the blocks together to create a new tool.

–

KIMBERLY: That was … 

• Amari in California.

• Helena in Florida.

• Elaina [e-LANE-uh] in Tennessee 

• John in Texas

• Livia and Damian in Illinois

This has been Asking Random Kids Not-So-Random Questions.

Part 1:

BRIDGET: Welcome back to Million Bazillion, on today’s episode we’re answering Garret’s question all about copyrights and royalties.

(SFX: DISCHORDANT PIANO TINKLING THROUGHOUT THIS WHOLE SCENE)

BRIDGET: Ryan’s been tinkering on the piano for the last (BELEAGURED) several hours, composing a song for us to sing during the karaoke scene of this episode so we don’t have to pay for a copyrighted song. How’s it going? 

RYAN: To be fair, I’m not quite at the composing part just yet. I’m searching for inspiration somewhere inside these 88 keys. 

BRIDGET: Do you… play the piano at all?

(SFX: RYAN TINKERS WITH BLACK KEYS ONLY)

RYAN: No. Which makes this tricky. Hmm, do you think everyone’s ever written a song with just the black keys before?

BRIDGET: Yeah, probably?

RYAN: How about just one note? Like G.

(SFX: RYAN PLAYS G ON PIANO)

RYAN: (SINGING TO PLAYING) G. G. G. Can’t you see, this song’s just G. 

BRIDGET: Alright, while you’ve been working that out, I’ve been reaching out to some lawyers who can help explain copyright law to us and I found a small family-run law firm that specializes in just this topic. Wanna go over there?

RYAN: Sure! Though I won’t be able to bring my keyboard! Drat!

BRIDGET: (FEIGNING DISAPPOINTMENT) Aww, no. How disappointing. Guess, you’ll have to leave it behind-

RYAN: Wait, a minute, I totally forgot this keyboard is portable!

(SFX: KEYBOARD COMING OFF STAND)

RYAN: That means I can take it anywhere, play it all day! No matter where we go, you’ll be able to hear me struggle to find a series of notes resembling a pleasant melody.

BRIDGET: Oh. How wonderful.

(SFX: TRANSITIONAL STING)

(SFX: LAW OFFICE AMBIENCE)

WINSLOW RIGHT: Welcome to the Rights Brothers Law Firm. I’m Winslow, this is my brother, Obert.

OBERT RIGHT: How do you do?

BRIDGET: You’re the Right Brothers, Winslow and Obert? Hmm, those names remind me of something else.

WINSLOW RIGHT: Really? Never gotten that before. Step into this room, please. 

(SFX: DOOR OPENS INTO ROOM WITH DISTANT OLD FASHIONED AIRPLANE SOUNDS) 

WINSLOW RIGHT: We call this room the hanger!

BRIDGET: Like an airplane hanger? 

WINSLOW: No, cause it’s a room to hang out in. Even has a nice view of the airport. So you say you have questions about copyright, eh? We’re not prepared, but ask us anything, we’ll just wing it!

OBERT RIGHT: Yeah, we Right Brothers love a blue sky approach!

BRIDGET: Yeah well, we were curious- 

(SFX: PIANO TINKERING)

RYAN: (SINGING) We were curious… and oh, so furious… about the art of copyrighting… and karate choppy fighting! 

BRIDGET: Ryan, can you stop writing your song just for a minute? Just while we’re in here, trying to have a conversation?

RYAN: Oh yeah, sorry.

BRIDGET: So, we wanted to know- what do you have to do to copyright something?

RYAN: Specifically, how do WE get a copyright? 

WINSLOW RIGHT: Well, the truth is- the second you finish something that’s your own- whether it’s a story, a song, a poem, a photo, a painting, you automatically own the copyright.

OBERT RIGHT: No one else can borrow it or copy it without your permission!

WINSLOW RIGHT: Though to enforce the copyright against other people in a legal setting, you gotta make sure your work is registered. 

OBERT RIGHT: Yeah, enforcement. That’s the ticket. 

RYAN: Well how do I make sure my claim and ability to profit from my original ideas, IP and otherwise, are enforceable?? 

WINSLOW RIGHT: The government charges a fee for that. $45 dollars. And that’ll get you your lifetime plus 70 years to profit from your work and intellectual property. And you get to put that little “c” with the circle around it next to your thing if you want.

RYAN: Ohhh, that’s what that little “c” stands for. So question, I haven’t quite finished my song yet-

BRIDGET: (ASIDE) You haven’t really started it yet.

RYAN: But I have some ideas for lyrics. Can I just copyright those now, so no one else can steal the loose ideas I have rattling around in my brain?

OBERT RIGHT: Naw, to copyright something, you gotta finish it first. No half ideas, no partial concepts. You can’t sue someone for taking an idea you were eventually gonna get around to writing. 

WINSLOW RIGHT: Same thing with artistic methods. Let’s say you’re high flying artist Jackson Pollack and your whole thing is you drip paint all over the canvas. You can’t sue someone who decides they wanna drip paint too. Even though they copied your method, they didn’t copy your work.

BRIDGET: So how is it determined, legally-speaking, that one artist copied another?

OBERT RIGHT: That’s where we come in. It can take a lot of time in and out of court to prove one work is the copy of other. Here’s a really good example, a song called “I Won’t Back Down” by Tom Petty.

(MUSIC: CLIP OF “I WON’T BACK DOWN” BY TOM PETTY)

OBERT RIGHT: 25 years after that song came out, another musician, Sam Smith, came out with this song called “Stay With Me””

(MUSIC: CLIP OF “STAY WITH ME” BY SAM SMITH) 

OBERT RIGHT: “Stay With Me” sounded so much like “I Won’t Back Down” that Petty refused to back down and got his lawyers involved.

RYAN: I dunno. Those songs don’t seem very similar to me. Are they even about the same thing?

OBERT RIGHT: They’re not! But it doesn’t matter. Two artworks don’t have to be an exact match in every single way  to prove intellectual property law has been broken. They just have to be similar enough. 

WINSLOW RIGHT: The two parties eventually settled and Tom Petty was given a songwriting credit and 12.5% of the money the song brings in, you know, royalties. 

BRIDGET: Wait a minute, though. At the beginning of the episode we realized we couldn’t play our karaoke selections because they’re copyrighted. But you just played snippets of two popular songs that were the subject of a major copyright dispute! Something’s fishy here! 

(SFX: PIANO TINKERING)

RYAN: (SINGS) There’s something’s fishy here, standing on the pier, I can see clear, into your ear!

BRIDGET: Ryan, stop it!

WINSLOW RIGHT: Well, there’s a big exception to using copyrighted material called fair use. [SFX SPARKLE] It can be okay to use copyrighted materials without even asking for permission or paying royalties if you’re going to comment or criticize something, if you’re going to report on it, or use it for teaching or research, for example. But the owner of the copyright might still take you to court to try to stop you and then it’s up to a judge to decide. 

SFX JUDGE GAVEL

WINSLOW RIGHT: I played those songs to teach a specific lesson on an educational podcast. But if right now, you wanted to sing, say, “Let It Go” from Frozen because you just think your audience would like hearing it, then you’d be hearing from Disney’s lawyers. 

RYAN: Let’s see about that. Let it G—[GAG/STRANGLED]. Okay, he’s totally right everyone! Totally right. 

OBERT: Well what did you think, this is the Right Brothers Law Office! 

RYAN:  So, wait, does copyright last forever? Like is Beethoven’s music still under copyright even though he’s been dead for 200 years?

(SFX: LIGHT BEETHOVEN SCORING)

OBERT RIGHT: No, copyright protections today go away 70 years after the creator passes away. Then the intellectual property enters what we call the public domain. That means anyone in the public can use it for any purpose. 

WINSLOW RIGHT: So Beethoven’s compositions are in the public domain. Shakespeare’s plays are in the public domain, Dracula, Sherlock Holmes, real old stuff like that. 

BRIDGET: Ohhh! So this is why anyone can sell Frankenstein costumes without having to give money to the author, Mary Shelley!

RYAN: But when I bought my Minions costume for Halloween, it was called “Little Yellow Helper Man.”  That costume manufacturer was trying to get around the copyright!

(END MUSIC)

BRIDGET: Wait a minute, I had a question though. You mentioned brand logos. Those are protected by copyright too?

OBERT RIGHT: Good question, and the answer is no. Brands are protected by something called trademark. Trademark is a lot like copyright except it’s represented by a little “™” instead of a little “c” with a circle around it.

WINSLOW RIGHT: Trademarks help protect things that define a brand’s identity like logos, slogans and product names. 

BRIDGET: Oh, so for instance, trademarks make it so you can’t open up a restaurant called McDonald’s with a big yellow M because another restaurant is already doing that. 

WINSLOW RIGHT: Yeah. You picked a gigantic and not very lovable company as an example, but trademarks are important to small companies too. They don’t want competitors profiting off their name and reputation, and they don’t want someone selling a defective product with their logo on it. 

OBERT RIGHT: Yeah, like if you want to buy a pair of sneakers that are known for their high quality. A competitor making a cheap knock off version can’t just slap a famous logo on their kicks and get away with it. 

(SFX: PIANO TINKERING)

RYAN: (SINGS) Super fast kicks…Not worth the licks…Up to their old tricks…… Songwriting is hard. Now I know how Beethoven felt. 

WINSLOW RIGHT: Right now, I wish I knew how Beethoven felt: deaf.

RYAN: Ok, we can’t thank you enough for explaining trademark and copyright law to us. You’ve given us a stunning overview, Right Brothers.

BRIDGET: Yes, thanks to the Right Brothers, we’re soaring… with legal information.

(SFX: MUSIC BUILDING ANTICIPATION TO BREAK)

RYAN: So, how’s this sound for next steps? We’ll finish writing our song, register it for copyright, get a record deal- and we’re guaranteed a record deal! Our stuff is that good! And then once our song has reached #1 on the Billboard 100, we’ll live the rest of our lives off fat royalty checks overflowing our mailbox! 

WINSLOW: But you’ll probably find that making a mint off of royalties is actually a bit more complicated than you think—

RYAN: Thanks! That’s the vote of confidence I need! We’ll be back after the break, learning how to collect our royalties- Right after this!

• MIDROLL -

Part 2:

(SFX: STREET AMBIENCE)

BRIDGET: Welcome back to Million Bazillion! Today, we’re out and about, learning all about copyrights, royalties, trademarks, all things related to protecting intellectual property. 

(SFX: PIANO TINKERING)

RYAN: Intellectual property… can’t you see… you and me… are making our own IP… 

BRIDGET: So, how’s the song coming, Ryan?

RYAN: Oh, just terrific. We’re well on our way to earning a fortune in royalties on a generation-defining pop anthem.

BRIDGET: That’s good because, on the advice of our lawyers, I’ve scheduled a meeting with another local legal concern, the Royal Family Law Firm. They specialize in royalty payments. 

RYAN: Great, where’s their office?

BRIDGET: … This building we’re walking up to, riiiiight…. now.

RYAN: Oh, good timing, let’s go in.

(SFX TRANSITION: ELEVATOR DINGS AND OPENS) 

(MUSIC: ROYAL TRUMPET FANFARE)

ELIZABETH: (BRITISH) Welcome to the Royal Family Law Firm, I’m Elizabeth. This is my junior associate and grand-daughter-in-law, Meghan.

MEGHAN: Hi, Meghan. Meghan Merkle. 

BRIDGET: Meghan… Merkle?

MEGHAN: Yes. 

BRIDGET: Pleasure to meet you. Sorry if this is a weird question, but are you two… royalty?

ELIZABETH: (CHUCKLES) Oh no, my dear, but we pledge to treat you like royalty whilst securing your legally-entitled royalty payments. How may we help you today?

RYAN: Well, we’re starting our journey as very successful songwriters, and we wanted to know when the time inevitably comes to collect royalties, how’s that all work?

ELIZABETH: Well, as you seem to already know, royalties are payments that are made to creators to use their work for profit. If you create a character like, say, Bluey, you earn royalties any time that character is loaned out to appear as a plushie toy or on a baby’s onesie.

RYAN: Ah, yes. And would Bingo get royalties as well?

ELIZABETH: Yes.

RYAN: And Bandit?

ELIZABETH: Yes.

RYAN: And Chilli?

BRIDGET: Yes, Ryan! It applies to Bluey’s whole family. Sorry, please continue, your majesty- I mean, Elizabeth.

ELIZABETH: Well, royalty payments are determined by licensing agreements between the owner of the copyright and whoever wants to use their work.

RYAN: Licensing? Like a drivers license? What does that have to do with anything?

ELIZABETH: Well, a license is simply a name for something that gives you permission. 

BRIDGET: Drivers licenses give you permission to drive a car. So these licenses are all about permission to…uh, IP things. 

ELIZABETH: A license means someone who came up with a creative idea is letting someone with a money making plan use the idea in question, for a limited amount of time. Legally. 

BRIDGET: So like, the t-shirt company says, hey, Bluey creators, let’s have a licensing agreement so that I can put Bluey on these t-shirts and you’ll get some money for it! 

ELIZABETH: Precisely! And it’s true for the songs you hear in movies too. Remember the kids’ movie, Sing?

BRIDGET: Oh yeah, about the animals in the singing competition?

ELIZABETH: Precisely. The movie Sing featured 65 songs, including hits by Taylor Swift, Stevie Wonder, The Beatles, Queen-

(SFX: ROYAL TRUMPET FANFARE)

BRIDGET: You had songs in that movie?

ELIZABETH: No. Queen and David Bowie.

BRIDGET: Oh, yes of course.

ELIZABETH: The more popular a song, generally the more expensive to license. A specific song could cost tens of thousands, to a couple hundred thousand to get permission to add to a movie. In Sing’s case, the licensing of all those songs added up to $12 million dollars.

RYAN: Wow! Good thing we didn’t license any songs today. $12 million dollars is more than we spend on an entire episode! 

BRIDGET: Or all our episodes ever, combined, all together, in total! Uh yeah… But I have a question. Let’s say you’re a musician whose music isn’t used in some big Hollywood movie, do they make royalties? 

ELIZABETH: Meghan, can you answer this one? I need to rest my feet for a minute. 

(SFX: CHAIR PULLING OUT)

BRIDGET: Wow, that throne- I mean, that chair is really gold.

ADD TRUMPET FANFARE

ELIZABETH: Hmm…. That it is. 

MEGHAN MERKLE: Meghan Merkle here, ready to answer your question. You want to know how musicians get paid if their music isn’t used in a big movie. Well the answer has changed over time, because of technology. 

RYAN: What do you mean, like because of venmo or zelle?

MEGHAN MERKLE: Uh, no. Today we listen to a lot of our music online and through streaming platforms like Spotify. Those services will pay the musician a small  amount But it’s not much. Like musicians might get half a cent per play

RYAN: A half a cent per play?!? So to make one dollar, my song would have to be streamed…

MEGHAN MERKLE: 200 times. .

BRIDGET: But what about before streaming?  

(MUSIC: LIGHT 2000s POP SCORING)

BRIDGET: Like when I was a kid, if you really liked a particular band, say Backstreet Boys, you had to go to the mall and buy their CD for, like, $15 dollars. (SPEEDING UP) And sometimes you didn’t even have money left over for a Hotdog on a Stick! And your mom would pick you up and ask, “Did you eat lunch, Bridget?” and you’d tearfully confess, “No, I spent the money on the Backstreet Boys CD instead of Hot Dog on a Stick!” And she’d say, “That’s it, I’m not giving you any more money for lunch if you’re not gonna buy lunch with it!” Argh, ok, fine whatever, Mom! 

(END MUSIC)

MEGHAN MERKLE: Uh, yeah, that’s a vivid picture you paint. But a musician would get more like $2 from that $15 you paid for the CD. 

ELIZABETH: People used to spend more money to buy music of the artists they liked. Or maybe I should say, they spent money, period! When you expect everything to be free and only consume media through unlicensed YouTube uploads or TikTok videos, worse yet, illegal torrents- creators are denied royalty payments. 

RYAN: Yeah, and that’s not a good thing. Because for every very mega-wealthy artist like Taylor Swift, there’s thousands of less famous, but very talented musicians and artists, like me, just struggling to get by, looking for any kind of compensation for their work. If you take in all that artists’ work for free, that might be a good deal for you, but don’t expect that artist to be able to keep working much longer. 

SFX: MED PITCHED DOGS BARKING [CONTINUE THROUGH AI SCENE]

BRIDGET: Wow, that’s a lot of dogs, what are those, corgis? 

ELIZABETH: Well, yes, you’re correct. 

MEGHAN MERKLE: And don’t even get us started on the copyright and royalty issues presented by the use of AI. 

BRIDGET: Oh brother, we really gotta wrap this conversation up or this is gonna turn into a two-parter-

MEGHAN MERKLE: Well, the only reason artificial intelligence would ever know how to make anything of artistic value would be from copying human work- but in most cases, that means violating a copyright. 

RYAN: Oh, so AI is sorta like a plagiarism machine. Good to know.

MEGHAN MERKLE: And it’s gonna be up to copyright lawyers like us to fight legal battles against AI companies who wanna swoop in and steal the history of human creativity for their own benefit, without paying a penny in royalties to the original creator.

BRIDGET: Wow, Meghan Merkle. Thank you for that surprisingly no-nonsense explanation of how copyright relates to AI. If any listeners have questions about AI they want us to answer, they can send those to us through our website, marketplace dot org slash million.  By the way, gotta say Meghan, I love your suit.

MEGHAN MERKLE: Thanks, I got my start in Suits.

BRIDGET: In Suits?

MEGHAN MERKLE: Yeah, selling suits at Men’s Warehouse. But I left retail to join the Royal family.

BRIDGET: Ok, well, thanks Elizabeth and Meghan for helping us out. We bow to you.

(MUSIC: ROYAL TRUMPET FANFARE)

BRIDGET: Uh, ok, yeah, so even though this has been a little confusing, we’re gonna try our hand at karaoke again, but this time making sure our podcast complies with copyright law.

RYAN: By the way, can we get some royalties for our podcast?

ELIZABETH: Sorry, no, that’s not the way podcasts work.

RYAN: Why not? 

BRIDGET: You heard Queen Elizabeth! It’s just not how podcasts work! We gotta take a break, and we’ll be back after this with an exciting musical conclusion of Million Bazillion.

- MINI SEGMENT- 

Part 3:

(SFX: KAROKE CROWD WALLA)

RYAN: Welcome back to Million Bazillion. We’re wrapping up our episode all about copyright law and we’ve come back to karaoke night to debut the song we’ve been working on this whole episode.

KARAOKE HOOLIGAN: You better not mess up this time, Bridget and Ryan! If your song doesn’t play, we’re gonna start a riot! It’s gonna get straight up mental innere! 

BRIDGET: (EXHALES) Ok, waiting won’t make this any easier. Let’s do this…

KARAOKE HOST: Welcome back, Bridget and Ryan! Let’s hope this works this time. 

(SFX: TAPS MIC, FEEDBACK)

BRIDGET: (INTO MIC WITH REVERB) Hi, we’re the hosts of Million Bazillion. And, if you’re ever heard our show, you know at the end of every episode we like to recap what we’ve learned on the topic. So tonight, that’s what we’re going to do… with an original song made just for this occasion. Because there are legal ways to protect your creative ideas, and to make sure that if someone’s going to be making money from them, that someone is gonna be you'!  Hit it!

(MUSIC: APM TRACK - “FREE AGAIN”)

RYAN: (SINGS)

When you come up with ideas someone might try to take them

You'd be surprised the ways they try to steal or fake them

You need protection from a thing that's called a copyright

If your IP is stolen it'll help you with the courtroom fight to claim what's right and legal

That's all there is to know about this- 

BRIDGET: (SINGS)

Hey wait a minute!

RYAN: (SINGS)

What is it?

BRIDGET: (SINGS)

You forgot about trademark!

Trademark is a similar protection but for brands

Companies need certain things to stay within their hands

like logos, stealing them's a nuh-uh, no go

RYAN: (SPOKEN)

Phew, I'm glad you remembered trademarks.

BRIDGET: (SINGS)

Don't mention it.

RYAN: (SINGS)

You really saved us there.

BRIDGET: (SINGS)

I said don't mention it. 

BRIDGET/RYAN: (SINGS)

There's so much to gain

from the property inside your brain

Before you get too excited

Make sure your work is copyrighted

RYAN: (SINGS)

Another thing we have to mention is royalties

It's payment for your IP through a bunch of tiny fees

The fees are super tiny when they come from Spotify

Fractions of cents that can't even be seen with the naked eye

or even magnified with microscopes

BRIDGET: (SPOKEN)

Well, I think that's overstating it a little.

RYAN: (SINGS)

Don't you mean understating? 

BRIDGET: (SINGS)

Oh, yeah, I guess you're right. 

RYAN: (SINGS)

That's ok. All good.

BRIDGET/RYAN: (SINGS)

There's so much to gain

from the property inside your brain

Before the flame of love's ignited

Be sure your love song's copyrighted

RYAN: (SINGS)

Be sure that song is copyrighted

CoolJamz Karaoke LLC

BRIDGET: (SPOKEN)

That's not a lyric, that's the karaoke video company logo.

RYAN: (SPOKEN)

Ah, yes. That it is.

(SFX: CROWD WHOOPS AND HOLLARS)

BRIDGET: Thank you! 

KARAOKE HOOLIGAN: I take back everything mean I said! That is what karaoke is all about! 

BRIDGET: Thank you, karaoke hooligan! You’re too kind!

(SFX: CROWD CHANTS “ENCORE! ENCORE!”)

BRIDGET: Ryan! They want us to sing another song!

RYAN: (TO CROWD) Oh, how nice of you all! That was the only song we have for now.

KARAOKE HOOLIGAN: We demand an encore! Or else!

BRIDGET: Uh oh, we don’t have any more original songs!

(SFX: CROWD GROWING RESTLESS)

RYAN: Wait, lemme see! They gotta have something in this karaoke library that’s in the public domain. Oh, here we go! Who wants to rock out to some Beethoven!?

(SFX: CROWD BOOS)

(MUSIC: BEETHOVEN: SONATA PATHETIQUE) 

RYAN: Oh no, we don’t have any lyrics!

BRIDGET: Let’s just sing the credits along to it! It’s the end of the episode anyway! 

RYAN: Good idea!

Credits

CREDITS POORLY SUNG ALONG TO A SLOW BEETHOVEN TUNE

(SFX: CROWD STARTS TO BOO)

RYAN: That’s all for this episode of Million Bazillion! Thanks for sticking with us to the very end. 

BRIDGET: And we mean the end, this was the end of the episode and the end of our season! 

RYAN: So it’s a perfect time to send us the money questions you want us to answer NEXT season! Send those to us through our website at Marketplace dot org slash million! 

BRIDGET: We had help for today’s episode from Yolanda King, director for the center for intellectual property, information and privacy law at University of Illinois. And Julie Kelley, Assistant General Counsel at American Public Media Group. 

RYAN: Million Bazillion is produced by Marketplace from American Public Media. I, Ryan Perez wrote and hosted this episode along with Bridget Bodnar. 

BRIDGET:  Our senior producer is Marissa Cabrera. Our editor is Jasmine Romero. And Flora Warshaw helped produce this episode. 

RYAN: It  was sound designed by Brendan Dalton

And mixed by Derek Ramirez with additional engineering by Charlton Thorp!

Our theme music was created by Wonderly. This song though was written by Beethovan! 

BRIDGET: And a special shout out to the folks who leant their voices to this episode: Courtney Bergsieker, Carole Conrad, Brendan Dalton, Drew Jostad, and Milo Warshaw. 

RYAN: Bridget Bodnar is the Director of Podcasts at Marketplace. 

Joanne Griffith is the Chief Content Officer 

Neal Scarbrough is the VP and General Manager.

BRIDGET: Million Bazillion is funded in part by the Sy Syms Foundation, partnering with organizations and people working for a better and more just future since 1985. And special thanks to The Ranzetta Family Charitable Fund and Next Gen Personal Finance for providing the start-up funding for this podcast, and continuing to support Marketplace in our work to make younger audiences smarter about the economy.

RYAN: If Million Bazillion is helping your family have important conversations about money, consider making a one-time donation today at marketplace-dot-org-slash-givemillion, and thanks for your support.

MB STING

BEAT

BRIDGET: That went okay right?

RYAN: Yeah, it was great. Grammys, here we come!