117
Economy gives some dads a bad rap
Shadows of mother with children.
To view this content, Javascript must be enabled and Adobe Flash Player must be installed.
TEXT OF STORY
Stacey Vanek-Smith: It seems like the recession and the unemployment rate are hitting every aspect of life these days. Divorce is no exception. As more parents feel a loss of income, many are asking family courts to adjust child support payments. The bad economy is also pushing some parents into payment delinquency, contributing to the problem of deadbeat dads.
From Boston, Monica Brady-Myerov reports.
Monica Brady-Myerov: When someone loses a job, the bills don't stop coming. Mortgage, car payments, health insurance and for some, child support. But Ned Holstein, president of Fathers and Families, a group that presents dads, says there's a big difference.
Ned Holstein: Everybody is struggling. But someone who has a child support order is the only person who's going to be put in jail, because they can't pay their debts.
That's why more parents who've lost their jobs are asking the courts to lower their child support payments. That's what's happening to Jim Feeney. He's a divorced father of four who lives on Cape Cod. Before he lost his job in January, he made about $85,000 a year. He's required to may $3,200 a month in child support and alimony. When he was laid off, he immediately asked the court if he could pay less.
Jim Feeney: First, I filed for unemployment, I filed for welfare, food stamps, because I had no income. I had no savings.
Feeney spoke about his case at a restaurant after his hearing, which he had to wait two and a half months for. The judge denied his request to lower his payments and after six months after not meeting them, Feeney was put in jail. After two days behind bars, he paid a $5,000 fine and was released. But his stint in jail didn't lower his child support obligations and the fines he's racking up because he's not paying.
Feeney: There's penalties to the state, there's penalties that go to my ex-wife, there's interest to the state, there's interest that goes to my ex-wife.
Feeney's former wife refused to comment for this story. But another ex-wife of another man who just lost his job does have something to say. She's Julie Baker, she's the primary care giver to two children, ages five and nine. Her ex was recently laid off.
Julie Baker: The first thing he said was, "I'll try to keep up the child support."
\
Baker said her former husband has been a supportive dad who's always paid on time. But if the tables were turned:
Baker: If I lost my job, I can't say to the kids, "You know what? You can't have lunch today. You know what? I'm sorry that your shoes are too small."
And more out-of-work parents want to change their child support agreements. But just asking the court to lower your payments, because you lost your job, isn't always enough.
Divorce attorney B.J. Krintzman says the courts are slow moving.
B.J. Krintzman: They're not going to get very far if they go in that week and say, "I lost my job, so I can no longer pay." Usually there has to be some kind of period of time that's gone by, so the obligor has to show attempts to get a job.
Some judges are sympathetic and lower payments right away, because they know it's unlikely someone will get a new job quickly. But typically it takes six months for a judge to make a decision.
Holstein: And during those couple of months, you can be going broke in a hurry.
Ned Holstein of Fathers and Families.
Holstein: Then when you get the hearing, typically, the family court judges will not give you relief at the first hearing. They say, "Well, how do we know this is going to be long standing? You might get a job next week. Also, you've got some assets, you can pay it out of your assets. And so, I'll see you again in three more months."
But it's putting fathers who mean well and love their kids in jail, because they can't pay.
Krintzman: And this is not daddy jail; this is real jail.
But divorce attorney B.J. Krintzman says what ends up happening is dads borrow money from family and friends.
Krintzman: Usually it is very rare that someone stays in jail for 30 days. So they do find ways to find the money and pay up the back child support and get themselves out of jail.
And when they do get out of jail, they'll owe even more, because child support obligations don't stop while someone is behind bars.
In Boston, I'm Monica Brady-Myerov for Marketplace Money.
Pages
I thank that the child support system suck. They don't go after these deadbeat fathers like they should. My son father is doing good and don't gave a care about his son. Here he is with a bank account, a nice big home, just went out a bought a nother new car. And own a hair solan, and has know time for his child. And when you tell the courts this they still do nothing. And once the child turn 18teen then its over, when you as the mother know deep down inside that the father has not payed all his child support to or for that child. They need to change the law on child support and get it togather. Do something about it stop letting fathers get away with not paying. And help the step father who will take care of another mans child. May be all the women should get togather and fight about it. One can not do it alone, from a made mom who knows.
I think that the Child Support System is barbaric...My x wife was going through a hard time back in 09 and to help her I was able to take care of our son half the time(before that it was every other weekend) so that she could work on herself and get back on her feet.(I loved and enjoyed having my son and wish he could have been with me more) During this time I continued to pay the $900 in child support up until the car that i cosigned with her during our marriage and in the divorce papers she was responsible for making the payments on that car...well the car was repoed. The Bank then came after me an wiped out my personal checking account to the tune of $2,500. I didnt know that this had happened until my landlord told me that my checked had bounced. Ok i had to make up the difference so my total loses were twice that amount plus all the fees.Her response was "look like thats your problem!" Now then during the time i helped her with our son it was costing me time at work plus travel time food exspense and fuel costs to take my son to and from school while i had him because i didnt live in his school district.I guess i was stupid for wanting to help our son and her but i wanted to be with my son so it was killing 2 birds with one stone... Ok i lost all that money because she didn't take care of her responsiblities and now that im still playing catch up and my business isnt doing so well in this economy i cant find a job and the courts want to put me in jail.Up until that time that all that happened(car repo) i was current on my child support...The court(Gwinnett County Superior Courts, GA) didnt care that she was in contempt( cost to file contempt in Gwinnett $250 ) and cause me hardship all they cared about was the money I owed her... Thankfully Child Support services after 2 year of trying to reduce my support finally come up with $405 a month which is much more reasonable. She is still fighting that after i had helped her when she was going through hard times...mean while my arrears keep adding up....I am so tired Of dealing with my sons mother. And cant wait till my son(almost 14) is 18 and I dont have to deal or see her anymore...Hope between now and March 17 I find a Job or My company income improves because if not I'm going to jail....
I see both sides of the story but I feel that the system is wrong in the way it treats non-custiodal dad's who really can't pay. First, let me say that I have 4 kids from 2 marriages & have NEVER received one cent in child support. I have a fiance who is facing jail time because he has been unable to pay the $1,100 a month in child support that the ex is supposed to get. he just got a jon making $450 a month. He was paying her $200 a month but as of 3 months ago has not been able to pay anything. We do not bother the ex BUT she stalks us. She has folllowed us around to find out where we live, she shows up at our work. She has stated to his family that she will not be happy till he is alone & has nothing in his life. She cheated on him all 14 yrs. of their marriage & even tried to pass off a baby of another nationality as his. She is vendictive because she is jealous of me & mad that she can no longer run his life & take advantage of him. She lies in court & gets away with it. She sits on her butt & never works. She gets free rent, utilities, food stamps & medical from the govt. My fiance got his court date postponed till March but has been told by the judge that he faces possible jail time. How the hell does putting him in jail solve anything???? He will lose his part-time job, screw up college & she won't get anything. Plus, there is no way in heck that he can pay the $19,000 back support. He has no money & no one that he can borrow it from. The sad thing is that she has commented to family members that she is not even sure if one of their kids is actually his. The kid is 12 years old & the judge says that he has to pay for him anyway since he claimed him as his all along. I hope KARMA kicks her in the butt someday. She wins because she is so good at lying & playing the victim.
I think the child support laws should be revised and the courts be more understanding towards the parents that are paying child support the economy is taking jobs away from people who work hard everyday like me we need to take a stand and demand our rights as parents who pay child support that we be herd in courts and write the president there is something wrong going on the people who file false child support cases, perturniy fraud get away with murder ripping off the system crying in court to the judges and case workers that take our money that we work hard for .I am a paying non-custodial parent right now I hardly get a chance to see may kids from my first ex-wife and I'm paying her for her falt for cheating and walking out the marrage on me and the second as well the same only thing about that one is that I feel the one child I have with her I feel I was miss lead by her to beleave my son with is mine and he really is not she took him out of my life four months after he was born and then two in a half years later she brings him back in my life and lied to me about how much she missed me and wanted our son and me to be a family as one under the same roof six months after being together marriage and a new house here comes the drama pickings with you to put you out of the home that the two of you are buying just make room for someone else to live and that individual is the reall father and he an she are living off of your tips and wages having fun laughing at you making ithard for me to support my family I have trying to keep a roof above our heads. Fathers have a right to be herd . This is a serious matter child support laws need to be revised especially in the state of Missouri.
I am a non custodial parent being beaten up by the child support system and the ex.
As I read all these posts, all I see is "i pay too much", I get too little" but the real problem is that everyone covets the idiot fiat currency we have so much, that they dont see the real issues.
Look closely into where the child support system started and what it has matured to. Its a govt program adopted from a private business that introduced it. How does a business grow? It needs more customers. What is the incentive to help real people in need when the bottom line is being reduced. Its pitting people against each other. Joint custody should be mandatory barring extreme cases. Although I dont have hardly any answers, If you had a child and decided to not want the other parent, expect nothing and be happy if you get something.
It may sound harsh, but how many of us on either side enjoy the control the govt has over us when there is a child involved? I for one feel like I am not a person anymore, just a subject of the state.
God Bless America!
As a single mother myself; I do agree with this topic; to an extent. I do believe that good fathers are being punished; all for losing a job. The problem is, all the "real deadbeats" out there give most good men a bad rap. Support is not meant for woman to get rich off, and too many woman make that a reality. Like anything else; the bad apples out there spoil it for all the good ones.
Pages
