5
To my dissatisfied daughter
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Tess Vigeland: For just a minute here, we're going to move away from seniors and retirees, and talk about people who are still working, or at least, trying to find work.
Laura Doyle lives in the Oak Forest suburb of Chicago. She and her husband have both been out of work for many months, and it's put a strain on her family, particularly her relationship with her teenage daughter. So Laura decided to write a letter.
Laura Doyle: Dear Daughter,
As you know, your father was laid off three years ago. I went back to work to make ends meet but I, too, fell victim to the Great Recession, and lost my job on your little sister's birthday. Seven days before that, we lost our health insurance. But as parents, it is your father's and my job to protect you.
When Daddy's unemployment ran out, he withdrew funds from his pension to keep a roof over our heads. It took me an entire year to convince the Department of Human Services we were poor enough to qualify for welfare. I hope you never know the shame of that, or the shame of being 40 years old and having to ask your mother if you can borrow 20 bucks to put gas in your car.
I never wanted you to know that I spent my birthday money on your graduation dress, or that Daddy and I have not exchanged Christmas gifts for three years.
But what I do want you to know is that we are not the only people in this boat. Many people are unemployed, and every one of us is doing what we can to get by. You say our chauffeur services are at your disposal, just because all your friends' parents have "real" jobs, whereas Dad and I "just sit around all day and watch TV" as you put it.
Who do you think cleans the house, makes dinner and mows the lawn? Leprechauns? And all those times that you cried your friends got to go on all those cool vacations and we suck because we never go anywhere? Did you know that I cried, too, because I was ashamed I can't give you those things?
Every single thing your father and I do is for you and your brother and sister -- if only for the sole purpose that you will one day leave this house better and stronger for having lived through it.
You are the reason I get out of bed in the morning. I love you more than life itself. I need you to respect that. I need your respect, period.
I need you to know that someday it will be better. Maybe not today, but someday.
Love,
Mom
Hill: It turns out Laura's "someday" is just around the corner. Her letter was published a couple weeks ago in the Chicago Sun-Times. James McClelland, the CEO of a local property management company, read the letter and called her in for a job interview. She starts Monday.
@ vadeltachi : 1) She is my Goddaughter and the story is legit 2) I am now and have been out of work since 12/09, I am 56,,do you know what the odds are for someone my age finding employment? There are those younger and more qualified in the same boat'. Rather than spew from your mouth do some research. 3) Her husband is in the trades,,I don't know what cave you crawled out of but there hasn't been any building going on for quite some time due to the economy. Her field,,cosmetics. Last I looked major box stores laid most of those people off. Once again, do some research. 4) In reference to her daughter getting a job, she's 13. I have a son who is 16 and has filled out over 50 apps to try and find summer work, not so much as a response. Not to mention a 21 year old in college who couldn't land one either. Who's going to hire a 13 year old? It's illegal. OH WAIT? But our great leader can grant amnesty to thousands of illegal aliens here ILLEGALLY to hold jobs, that's okay though,,right? Your ignorance precedes you! @jrking123: 2 of the finest parents I know who don't need parenting. If someone needs parenting skills,,lets start with the untold number of drug / career welfare mama's that have 6 kids from 6 different baby daddies and are bleeding the nation dry on our dime! These 2 people sacrificed for their kids by doing without so their kids could have a little. Their kid sees kids who's parents are more affluent and able to provide more and as a typical teenager questions why. The mother writes her response and right away she is branded by people who pre judge with no knowledge. What I
say to you both,,STFU!!! You are both uninformed, judgmental nobody's!
jrking123 -- my 70-year-old mother, when talking to her 76-year-old sister, still refer to their now-deceased father (my grandfather) as "daddy". I may not have referred to my own father as "daddy" since I was a child, but my mother still refers to him that way in 3rd person when talking to me. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, and sometimes a term is just a cultural expression and not a sign of oversheltering, helicopter parenting, or incest. Congrats to Laura Doyle, may this job last her a long time, and may her daughter be a better person for the experience of t.
@vadeltachi: "Three YEARS without a job? That's not reasonable or believable. " - you may be missing the fact that there is a jobs shortage out there, they are not plentiful. Things have improved to the point where only 13+ Million people are pursuing 3.5 Million open positions - with skills and geographic mismatches. This is an improvement from the 7-to-1 applicant ratio at the height of the Great Recession; but in the 'old normal', that ratio was less than 2-to-1.
I must agree. Why did the daughter not get a job and support her family and, at least, her wants herself? Why is she so entitled? Have her spend several hot or cold nights out helping others, work at a soup kitchen, spend a week sleeping in the car, do SOMETHING selfless rather than so rudely treating her parents and playing victim. That mentality will doom her for the rest of her life and she needs help to change now while she still can.
Three YEARS without a job? That's not reasonable or believable. Is there something missing from the story?
This is a dysfunctional family, and that's what the story / article should be about. I am embarrassed for this family, for the schools and social institutions that clearly have failed in educating them and for a deeply troubling entitlement mentality that is persistent in our society today.
I congratulate her on getting a job. But... it sounds like they need help parenting. By over-sheltering her child (writing "Daddy" when addressing a teenager?) they are raising the kind of "me first, you never" self-absorbed individual the world is already overpopulated with.
Here is the obvious movie reference: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mildred_Pierce_(film)
