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Spirit of the (cyber)season
Does the embrace of online shopping lessen the meaning of the holiday season?
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The essence of gift-giving is not just the gift itself but also the effort that goes into it. Few of us have the time or skill to make a gift from scratch, but we used to at least spend days finding just the right token of our affection.
Not long ago, holiday shopping entailed traipsing from one store to another with our list of loved ones. Ducking crowds, sorting through items, standing in line at cash registers. And then once we found the gifts, we had to lug them home, find the right wrapping paper and a suitable ribbon. And then there was the whole process of putting the wrapped gift into the mail or even delivering it in person. The entire enterprise required lots of time. Lots of effort and thought. It was hard work. That's what gift giving was all about.
But online shopping is displacing all of this. Minimum effort is the selling point for online retailers who now ask little of the giver beyond naming a price range, typing in an address, and then offering a credit card. Presto, it's done. Someone I know boasts she did all her Christmas shopping online in less than an hour.
But wait. If thoughtfulness and effort are a big part of the value of a holiday gift, then almost-effortless holiday shopping contradicts the whole meaning and spirit of the exchange. Packages zip directly from the gift-giver's point and click, to computerized warehouses, to recipients -- without any evidence of human intervention let alone personal effort.
I've already received two holiday gifts whose givers weren't even identified, and another from someone whose name appears on an impersonal print-out that looks like a laundry ticket.
Now call me old-fashioned, but I think we're losing something here. The thought behind the gift is as important as the thing being given. But we've automated and depersonalized gift-giving to the point where what's being given is just a thing without much of a thought.
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This is a short sighted view of online shopping. The implication that just because a gift came from a retail store means that some sort of thought was put into it is assuming too much. Your "labor intensive" retail gift may have been nothing more than an afterthought while the gifter was out doing their "real" shopping. "Oh, I have to get something for so-and-so. This thing that I just laid my eyes on and is within arm's reach will do."
On the other hand, the internet offers a world of possibilities in gift giving that are not always available locally. This year when shopping for a special gift for my husband, I spent more time researching the gift online than I would have if I purchased the gift locally in a store. I visited said store, and found they had merely two options. If there was no online shopping, I would have spent only a few minutes pondering each choice and picking one or the other for some insignificant reason. However, having the wealth of knowledge the internet supplies, I spent days researching various brands and models, visiting discussion websites, and reading countless reviews before making my purchase online.
Thought and effort is what matters, but don't assume that stepping foot in a brick and mortar store somehow equals more love than using our electronic resources. For some, more thought and effort goes into internet buying than merely stepping foot inside a mass merchandise outlet.
I usually agree with Mr. Reich - but he is missing something here. I have spent about 5 hours online so far - trying to find the perfect gifts for my grandkids and other family. I still haven't finished! Mr. Reich has forgotten one still must actually give thought to what to buy.
Just wanted to say that shopping on line makes it easier to purchase gifts for my family who live in England. I can save money by not having to pay for shipping from the US and put it toward the gifts. This also makes returns possible if needed. I also purchase a gift certificate for my daughter who collects expensive wine glasses [she's a sommelier] that I can't find in Tucson. Everyone gets a gift they want. Everyone is happy.
Tucson Teresa
Hell yes, Mr. Reich. Guess what, I heard your commentary as I was driving back from the Post Office, having just deposited five different-sized packages of dates and citrus. I do the shipping at Flying Disc Ranch, in Southern California. We mainly sell our fruit at California farmers markets, yet we have a website - and we do not take web orders. No. We do not accept phone or email orders. We've never taken credit cards. Customers print up our order form, hand-write their order, arrange an envelope, stamp, and a check, and send in their orders to us... I, in turn, pick up their orders at the Post Office and make a project out of fulfilling their wishes: I must take all varieties of the dates out of the cooler into the packing shed (approximately 10 boxes weighing 12 lbs. each), harvest the citrus (walk out into the field for the perfect specimens), make date boxes (fold them up), write the names of the dates onto paper bags, inspect and weigh the dates, place them in the bags, then into their date palm-printed boxes, and finally into the correct flat-rate Post Office box, write a message or include a card if someone has sent one along, occasionally gift wrap the boxes, print up a shipping label and affix to box, then bring it to the Post Office a mile down the road. It's fun. Not! It can be A LOT of work, for both myself and our dear customers. Sometimes I used to think it was torture; that the packing shed was my personal prison... I take a lot of time and effort to do it well, and that takes.... time. Each order is entirely unique, like a snowflake. I give consideration and so much compassion for these individuals who have taken the time to go through unusual effort to place an order, for themselves or their loved ones. I'd love them just for that, and we have a legion of repeat customers, whom I enjoy getting to know through their order form notes, email questions, and phone calls. So there. Take that - VISA and Mastercard. Try competing with a small permaculture ranch, large and impersonal online companies! They can't touch this. We'd never let them. It would be silly. We are completely inefficient, and that's why our fruit tastes so good. Thank you for recognizing, Mr. Reich, that the effort and love counts. We love to do it and wouldn't have it any other way... plus, God knows if we automated things... I would never leave the packing shed! We don't want more mail order than we can handle. Small is beautiful. Thanks yo and stay tuned for more. I say, shop at the farmers market for everything you possibly can... greens are gifts. Plants, herbs, even a bunch of sorrel or a beautiful head of lettuce make perfect presents. Everyone loves a pomegranate or a dragonfruit... or indeed a fresh grapefruit with ruby blush. There are so many great gifts to share there... and you can learn how to make things (mainly you just need to block off a little time)... we can ALL do it, if we go slow and think about people throughout the year. Trial and success... Merry Christmas.
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